Everything Is Better With Bacon! - A Nickname Post

More people read the Night Owl’s comments than read my blog. It is a fact. It makes sense. He runs a great blog and EVERYBODY reads it and comments. I read his comments too. I had planned on boycotting him after the brutal bipping he issued me (on my 400th post no less) but his blog is too good. I just make a really angry face while I read it. Anyway, this week he wrote a Pulitzer worthy post on nicknames. I made the comment that my nickname is Bacon. Since that comment, most of my messages have been addressed to Bacon. The Owl is all powerful (pOWLerful). It’s okay. All of my actual friends call me Bacon. It’s time my virtual friends did as well. It is honestly difficult pulling off all of my different names. I write a lot of emails (300 per day at least). For school I use my real name (top secret). For work I use my real name (still top secret). As a writer I have a pen name. As a photographer I have a different lens name. As a writer of fiction I use a totally different name. For roller derby I am known as Side of Bacon, or Bacon for short. My record label is called Bacon Towne Records (yes, that is my neck). I go by Marck Bacontowne or Bacon. I have bacon related tattoos and now have bacon inspired clothing and accessories. Still, within the blog-o-sphere, I have always been Troll (and I have never recieved any Troll gifts...) Then again, everything is not always better with Troll. This year for Christmas I got a bunch of gifts that were Bacon related. I wonder if the Night Owl gets Owl themed presents. Do they have owl-flavored dental floss? I am sure that gummie owls exist and there are likely Owl-aids and Owl banks...Do your readers send you these things along with Ron Cey cards? I will say that of all of my bacon presents the bacon Band-Aids have been the most useful. I am waiting for a special occasion to take the dental floss for a spin. The bacon air freshener was in my car and I actually carry the bacon wallet. The bacon sculpture is awesome because someone made it for me and I love the piggy banks (we have 100 piggy banks easily), but my favorite is the Patron Saint of Bacon figure. I will take it out of the box and show some better pics one day. Apparently it is Saint Anthony who is bacon’s patron saint. There is a sticker on the box that states “Bless your bacon” and Saint Anthony is holding a skillet with 2 strips of bacon in it. It comes with a prayer and further states on the back of the box that “Saint Anthony is the protector of pigs, hermits, gravediggers and epileptics” The prayer is supposed to assist in the enjoyment of quality bacon (no one needs assistance, but..) It reads “Oh wondrous Saint Anthony, please bless me with an abundance of quality bacon and grant me the patience and timing to properly fry each glorious strip, Amen”. Is there an Owl prayer? Do I have you beat there? Anyway, I love these useless takers of space. My house is a delightfully cluttered mess. The wife and I are both VERY busy people and we have no young children living with us. Just her and I, the dog and Sally Cat and we don’t mind. I LOVE my palace of clutter. Someday I will post pictures. Our house is raised and the whole first level is a garage, but we have an indoor staircase which is decorated in old school punk rock show flyers. We collect street signs and will hang anything on the wall. There is no bare wall space in the casa de Troll. No empty shelf space either. If there were, that is where the next stack of cards would land. Anyway, this is my nickname post. I had to copy cat that insomniac owl. It’s what I do. Anybody else have a nickname with corresponding knick-knacks? If anyone needs me I will be at Tropicana Field hanging with the 2010 American League leading Tampa Bay Rays! I hope they can hang onto first place for a while. We will see. The team hasn’t posted a list of who is attending and signing. I do know that they are charging 20 bucks for an all-day autograph wristband, but all of the proceeds go to Haiti Relief. I believe it is still free for kids. Esther Gin N Juice will be joining me. I gave her a whole stack of cards to hang on to. Carlos Pena is her top priority. Esther Gin N Juice is a nickname, but it is less knick-knackable than Bacon with its duel meaning. That is all, enjoy the wonders of bacon! It makes EVERYTHING BETTER! Oh, to the reader who sent me the Jonny Gomes statue and didn’t include a letter: THANK YOU!!! I LOVE IT! If there are any country music fans out there who know who Adrian Ray is, he will be at our bout on Sunday. You never know who you are gonna see at a Bradentucky Bombers event… Thanks for the fodder Owl, I bow to the power of your words... Everyone else, please tell me your nicknames! Who knows, there might be a small prize involved... Go Rays! Go Bombers! Troll out.